How can I be better? What can I do to stand out? Am I the fastest? Did I win? How do others see me? Has my life been a success?
These questions sound like a broken record “on repeat” in my head just like that commercial jingle or song you can’t get out of your head but wish you could! And I recognize so much of my self-worth and how I define myself has been linked to how I answer these questions.
In June, I competed in my first Hyrox race, which is a combination of strength and endurance activities. Since then, I have had some time to reflect on the competition as well as my training for the event.
It was an immensely satisfying and fulfilling experience. Prior to this, I had found myself in a rut and a negative feedback loop coming off my 2021 Boston Marathon performance. I had really bottomed out in my competitions, and I was physically not feeling well.
This combination was really impacting my confidence in my performance ability and, if I'm completely honest, it was really impacting my overall well-being. I can only speak to my experience on how I view myself, but for better or worse, much of my self-image is tied to my physical performance. I recognize that this isn't necessarily a healthy way to define my success as a human; but like most, I am a work in progress.
This competition and its training gave me permission to "fail" and that was freeing. I'm really blessed to have people around me who support me and my choices. This support, most significantly from my husband, has been critical to my individual growth and happiness - it allowed me to change my career at 40, reconnect with my running at 48 and then try something completely different at 53 when I was completely out of sorts. I also had an on-site support team that included my husband, my son, and my coach. Having them at the competition gave me a boost. Hearing their cheers and seeing my son’s pride in his strong mom – honestly was like being on the podium! I am really savoring this moment and I am grateful for it.
It also made me aware that success and satisfaction are not linked to winning or being the fastest and that personal growth often comes from stepping outside your comfort zone – I never thought I would be able to push that sled, but I crushed it. After the competition, I challenged myself to slow down and not jump right back in ... that broken record in my head always has me rushing to the next goal.
Like Ted Lasso, I’m a work in “prog-mess”, but I feel good about my chances.
Sarah Courtemanche, Personal Trainer
About Sarah:
Personal Trainer with Equinox specializing in Pre/Post Natal, Rehabilitation, General Health & Functional Movement, Aging Population as well as a trash can, sherpa and transportation specialist (AKA - Mom)
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